I've never read an Asterix comic. There were plenty opportunities, they were always around the house but I just never picked one up. Smee on the other hand read them all and would still happily re-read them to this day. Smee loves Asterix and especially likes Dogmatix. While chatting to Frenchie Cuz last night, he mentioned that he liked 'Idefix' to which I asked 'Who?'. 'Obelix's dog!' 'Oh, you mean Dogmatix?' Idefix is the French name for Dogmatix! How cool is that? Frenchie Cuz was so surprised but we both found it awesome that the English translation was such a good interpretation of the original French name and if anything, better than the original French pun.
I'm not sure how I discovered the existence of Parc Asterix but I think I might have been researching Paris Disneyland and this was offered as a more grown-up alternative. I was taken to the official website which back then only had a French verison and despite not understanding anything, I understood this place had ROLLERCOASTERS. Not crappy, kiddy rollercoasters, but destroy-your-back-adults-only rollercoasters.
I have been wanting to tick it off my bucket list ever since and I had been bugging/begging Moo over the weekend to allocate Sunday as Parc Asterix day. Smee, even though he is not a maniac for rides like me, has wanted to go to Parc Asterix for the sheer experience of being immersed in Gaul cartoon land. There was some genuine anger when I told him that I would be visiting Gaul land without him. Yeah, he was pretty upset with me. Don't worry Smee, I'll take you there! Today is just a practice run! Muwahaha.
I have been wanting to tick it off my bucket list ever since and I had been bugging/begging Moo over the weekend to allocate Sunday as Parc Asterix day. Smee, even though he is not a maniac for rides like me, has wanted to go to Parc Asterix for the sheer experience of being immersed in Gaul cartoon land. There was some genuine anger when I told him that I would be visiting Gaul land without him. Yeah, he was pretty upset with me. Don't worry Smee, I'll take you there! Today is just a practice run! Muwahaha.
Despite retiring quite late from last night's shenanigans, Moo and I heroically made the extra effort to wake up early to maximise our day. There are several ways to get to the park and we opted for public transit which all up took about 30-40 minutes. The park is about 35km out of central Paris, about the same distance as Paris Disneyland. We dropped off little baby Gnoudesavanes at Chatelet station and hopped on the RER B3 (blue line) to all the way to the second last stop, CDG Airport Terminal 1&3. We headed upstairs from the platforms to find the ticket booths marked 'Parcs de Loisirs'. Although not a very official looking booth, it was quite obvious and situated close to the bus terminal and toilets.
Here Moo and I bought the combined entrance (€40)/shuttle bus (€6.90) ticket which cost us €41, a saving of €5.90. Deal! I had no idea what the ticket booth guy was asking but luckily Moo kinda did. The shuttle buses depart every 30 minutes and we jumped on excited about today's adventure.
The next I return to Parc Asterix I'm gonna try for a weekday. Yes, I am that definite about coming back. The queue into the actual park wasn't long but the wait for some rides were up to an hour. The first ride we went on was due to excitement and it had a short-looking queue - Epidemais Croisieres.
Moo and I realised this was a kiddie ride and we were pretty much the only adults without kids in the queue. We devised a plan to get on all the monster rollercoasters and titled it 'Get on the all the rides that Smee won't go on.'
Next up - La Trace du Hourra.
I swear, they employed some darn good engineer and physicists to design this ride. Newton's Laws were certainly obeyed and I'm appreciative that the designers understood them better than I did. As Mooey pointed out, we were essentially in a giant bobsled for most of the time and I did yell 'THIS IS SO UNSAFE! THIS IS SO UNSAFE!' during the ride. However, I was also simultaneously laughing my head off and screaming. Man, if the queue wasn't so long, I'd jump right back on this ride.
Next was Periferix, a mini rollercoaster. Parents, if you want to train your kids to enjoy big rollercoasters, this would be a good starting point.
Next up, Goudurix, a corkscrew rollercoaster. Not one or two but SEVEN loops! YIPPEEEEEE!!!
We both felt a little dizzy after the ride but soldiered on and wobbled towards the Tonnerre de Zeus.
We were unlucky enough to queue behind the French equivalent of English teenage chavs. Ugh. They constantly felt the need to spit on the ground for no reason. Anyway this ride... kinda hurt. The cart seats were not cushioned and banging our backs against the hard seats didn't do us any good. The sudden stop at the end threw everyone's neck out. But... it still was fun!!
Hungry by now, Moo and I wandered around the grounds and decided that we wanted to eat amusement park food. Hot dogs for lunch it is. I got annoyed at myself for spilling tomato sauce on my white dress :-S
We had smartly left the water rides to the end and with our tummies satisfied, queued up at Le Grand Splatch.
I was a bit disappointed to not have gone on more rides, but we were both fairly tired from the whole weekend and the long-ish queues, well what can you do. We stopped to buy a few souvenirs - as if I was going to leave without buying something! - and hopped back onto the shuttle bus.
For those interested in going, just be aware Parc Asterix is not open year round. But for anyone who loves rides, get your ass down here - this place was SUPER-FUN! I can't wait to go again! I don't understand the few bad reviews about the park. Long queue times? C'mon what do you expect? Which major theme park have you been to where the queue is less than 15 minutes? Crowded? Don't go on a weekend or public holiday, you idiot.
Smee was the recipient of my purchases. Dogmatix t-shirt, a mini dogmatix and figurine magnets of Obelix and Asterix. Moo bought a giant Obelix which I kinda really wanted too but I had so much stuff to carry back to London, I just couldn't fit him.
Tired from all the weekend activity, we decided not to venture too far for dinner and settled in at a local brasserie.
Oh yeah. Here we are. A giant Asterix on top of the mountain greets us.
Mooey with the map. Listen to the atmospheric music!
The park is divided roughly into sections of the different empires featured in Asterix. Here we go to Ancient Gaul. :D
The next I return to Parc Asterix I'm gonna try for a weekday. Yes, I am that definite about coming back. The queue into the actual park wasn't long but the wait for some rides were up to an hour. The first ride we went on was due to excitement and it had a short-looking queue - Epidemais Croisieres.
I made sure Moo fulfilled the 1.30m height requirement.
Moo with the Bavarian-looking Swiss. Me with some errr.. Asterix characters.
Moo and I realised this was a kiddie ride and we were pretty much the only adults without kids in the queue. We devised a plan to get on all the monster rollercoasters and titled it 'Get on the all the rides that Smee won't go on.'
Next up - La Trace du Hourra.
Moo not so happy about the 30 minute wait time from here. We already had been in the queue for 15 minutes!
During our wait there was plenty of time to inspect the track or more like, come to the realisation that 'Hey, wtf, I think this ride has NO TRACKS!!!' I verbalised this thought a few more times at various points during the wait because I simply could not believe it. Then I saw a part of the ride where, yep, it was confirmed, your cart is not attached to the track.
Mooey and I in position. Ok, so this was not the smartest time to whip out a camera but I had to get a memento! At least if things went wrong on the ride, there would be evidence that Moo and I went out with a bang.
I swear, they employed some darn good engineer and physicists to design this ride. Newton's Laws were certainly obeyed and I'm appreciative that the designers understood them better than I did. As Mooey pointed out, we were essentially in a giant bobsled for most of the time and I did yell 'THIS IS SO UNSAFE! THIS IS SO UNSAFE!' during the ride. However, I was also simultaneously laughing my head off and screaming. Man, if the queue wasn't so long, I'd jump right back on this ride.
Next was Periferix, a mini rollercoaster. Parents, if you want to train your kids to enjoy big rollercoasters, this would be a good starting point.
The queue was short-ish so we joined. Moo and I were both impressed to see attendants kicking off kids who were clearly too short off the ride. Why are some parents so dumb? There are signs everywhere informing you about the height restriction.
On our way to the next ride, a castle smiled down at Moo. She smiled back.
Next up, Goudurix, a corkscrew rollercoaster. Not one or two but SEVEN loops! YIPPEEEEEE!!!
The queue was short-ish, still about 30 minutes. This ride FREAKING ROCKED!!!!
We both felt a little dizzy after the ride but soldiered on and wobbled towards the Tonnerre de Zeus.
60 minutes from here. A good, old fashioned, rickety wooden rollercoaster. Doesn't really look safe. The wooden joints moved with the carts. There are so many joints, how does the maintenance guy keep up? Eeep.
Moo and Zeus.
Zeus wears floral undies!
We were unlucky enough to queue behind the French equivalent of English teenage chavs. Ugh. They constantly felt the need to spit on the ground for no reason. Anyway this ride... kinda hurt. The cart seats were not cushioned and banging our backs against the hard seats didn't do us any good. The sudden stop at the end threw everyone's neck out. But... it still was fun!!
Hungry by now, Moo and I wandered around the grounds and decided that we wanted to eat amusement park food. Hot dogs for lunch it is. I got annoyed at myself for spilling tomato sauce on my white dress :-S
Hehehe Obelix on a merry-go-round. Moo heads to the Gaul Village with her Asterix-themed doggy bag.
Now this was a bit tightass. I was hoping to see (several) Obelix and Asterix walking through the park grounds and get a photo with them. Instead they were behind a wooden fence and you had to pay for a professional photograph! Moo and I got our own unofficial ones anyway.
Awwww Dogmatix/Idefix's kennel.
We tried on Obelix's shoes. Big, they were.
Helping out with roasting the dinner.
Well at least there were some druids wandering around town. All hail me, the chief of the village!
We had smartly left the water rides to the end and with our tummies satisfied, queued up at Le Grand Splatch.
A 30-40 minute queue wasn't bad. Inside the cave leading to the water ride. This was a relaxing way to finish the day. The views from up top were nice. The water splash at the end wasn't too big. I'm not really a fan of water rides. Who wants all that dirty water on them?
I was a bit disappointed to not have gone on more rides, but we were both fairly tired from the whole weekend and the long-ish queues, well what can you do. We stopped to buy a few souvenirs - as if I was going to leave without buying something! - and hopped back onto the shuttle bus.
For those interested in going, just be aware Parc Asterix is not open year round. But for anyone who loves rides, get your ass down here - this place was SUPER-FUN! I can't wait to go again! I don't understand the few bad reviews about the park. Long queue times? C'mon what do you expect? Which major theme park have you been to where the queue is less than 15 minutes? Crowded? Don't go on a weekend or public holiday, you idiot.
Tired from all the weekend activity, we decided not to venture too far for dinner and settled in at a local brasserie.
Tuna tartare, escargot and the house special cheeseburger.
Aaaah Paris, you never disappoint. :D
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