Shocolate

I am still on a not-so-active-just-incidental search to find a macaron in Australia which can satiate my cravings for those found in Paris (or any place where I can get fresh Pierre Herme).   Shocolate might have a good shot.  They've won the award for Best Chocolate Macaron.  Just around the corner from Naked for Satan, I stopped after our lunch and bought a few to test the waters.  

A random selection. 

I made sure I bought prize winning Black and White macaron.  

Biting into the B&W chocolate and the salted caramel macarons.

What can I say?  I think I am destined to be disappointed by any macaron not made by Pierre Herme.  They've set the bar too high.  The shell was almost soggy.  What the hell.  It was like they'd been kept in the fridge and absorbed moisture.  The flavours were decent though but the texture kinda blergh.  I might try it again in the future - maybe today wasn't a good day in the patisserie.  

Naked for Satan

Before even venturing to the Basque Country, I had wanted to try out Naked for Satan.  

Before I had any idea what pintxos were, I'd heard that Naked for Satan had Spanish nibbles and I was keen to inspect this strange bar food they called 'pintxos'.  

It's a very nice space inside and it oozes urban, Fitzroy coolness.  You can read all about the history and how the bar got it's peculiar name on the website.  

Yeah - I am a cool looking bar.

The food is set out on the counter much like in San Sebastian and Bilbao.  The only difference here is that hygiene practices are observed and you gotta use tongs.  

Like in the Basque region, the honour system is place (bring your toothpicks to the counter) and this brave, new concept is partly responsible for drawing in the crowds.  The price of each pintxo, $2, is another reason.  The third reason is the food, but I'll get back to that later.

During happy hour times (see the website for details), the pintxos are reduced to 80 cents each.  80 cents?!?!  How long can you run this for?  They do make it very clear on menus placed on tables that they are just a bar and not a restaurant and urge you to order a drink with your food as that is their main source of income.  Fair enough I say and people should respect the owners and pay their dues.  

Spu and I did what was asked and ordered drinks.  What I really wanted was a kalimotxo but I couldn't see it on the menu.  It's not a hard thing to make (coke and red wine) so I thought I'd ask if they do it.  'Do you serve kalimotxo?'  The barman looked at me quizzically like as though I just made up an imaginary word.  I was hoping that the barman (possible owner?) might have been to the Basque Country and may have known what I was referring to but alas he didn't.  That's fine.  When I told him what it was, I was hoping he'd offer to make it up for me, but he didn't.  Oh well.  Cranberry juice it is then.  

Now onto the food.  Spu and I grabbed a plate each and this is what we got: 

Various pintxos, mostly on bread.  Various spreads with toothpicks holding extra toppings on it.  The baguettes were very... Vietnamese. 

More breaded pintxos.  Every so often a waitress would walk out and offer you a tray of hot pintxos and we had a few of those too.  Nearly everything is on baguette slice.  Ok, I understand how they can charge 80 cents.  

Initially it seems to be much like what I ate in San Sebbie and Bilbao, however on closer inspection, many items resembled nothing of what I encountered in SS an Bilbao.  That is not a bad thing.  Taking a country's cuisine and making it your own - a la poison pork rolls - often surpasses the original.  In this case, I don't feel that was the situation.  I'm not saying the food was terrible, it just was a poor man's pintxos.  Basically, they've tried to replicate the great pintxos bars in Spain and have come up sub-par.  

My biggest criticism is the use of 'jamon'.  You can't just slap a piece of cured ham to bread and call it 'jamon'.  That is sacrilege.  Most, if not all of that cured meat was definitely Italian prosciutto.  It was just too salty to be jamon, lacked the jamon aroma that fills your mouth and more pointedly looked exactly like prosciutto I've bought from the supermarket!   Hence, the flavour was all WRONG.  I also had an arancini ball (what's that in Spanish) which was served cold.  Err, shouldn't it be hot?  On top of that, it was dry, tasteless and I had to spit it out.  

I think people have been blinded by the 'wacky' concept and cheap food (and maybe too by the alcohol) that they overlook what they are eating.  The food could stand to be a bit better and I'm not saying that just because I've eaten in the heart of Pintxos-land.  It actually wasn't... that... great.  Yes, Naked for Satan is technically a bar and you could argue that the pintxos are an added bonus but they certainly have no pulling power over me.  Ok, fine, maybe I am being a food-snob.  I know I sound overall a bit cynical about it, but I must applaud Naked for Satan for putting pintxos on the Melbourne map.  I would go back for a drink but my only suggestion would be to add kalimotxo the menu!    

Bistro Guillaume

When Ma told us she was having dinner at the casino, Spu and I thought, 'We'll go eat at the casino too!'.   We looked at the restaurants available, decided that Rockpool tickled our fancy and then got excited at eating the famous macaroni and cheese, which is no longer $10 but a hefty $15.  Anyway our excitement was deflated when I rang up to reserve a table but was told nothing would be available until 9pm :(  That's too late!  Ma would have thrown all her money in the pokies machine by then!  So we booked at the more reasonable hour of 7pm at Bistro Guillaume.  

The restaurant is like a posh-er version of the bistros you see in Paris.  By posh-er, I guess I just really mean cleaner because the building is less old.  They had pretty light fittings though - like bubble skirts!  It used to be a much snootier fit-out but I think this renovation ties in better with the food they're serving.

I have a fridge magnet which sums up most of my meals - 'A meal without wine is a like a day without sunshine.'  I can't remember which red I ordered.  

Spu and I pondered over the menu and decided on the following: 

Charcuterie plate to share.  Love my cured meats, pates and rillettes.  Ok, I don't really like rillettes as much as the other two - too chunky.  

Because of Rumi's slightly disappointing lamb yesterday, I had the Sunday plat du jour - roasted lamb shoulder with braised vegetables and lamb jus.  Ratatouille to share.  Spu had the steak frites with béarnaise sauce.

Happiness is eating your steak and frites, knowing that you're getting a free meal because Pooey is paying for dinner.

We were both pretty full from dinner, but I insisted on having a tarte tartin with cinnamon ice cream.  It was partly because I saw someone make tarte tartin on TV today and realised I'd never eaten one before.

Happiness is eating a tarte tartin for the first time.  Although this will probably be my last time as I don't think I can ever be truly impressed with a puff pastry-based tart.  

Nothing bad to say.  The food was just like how it is in Parisian bistros.  The staff were all French-accented too which added more to the atmosphere.  Go eat there if you miss Paris!

Rumi

When I told Tina and Shazza I'd be back in town for dinner, we decided to book Abla's as it's been on both of our to-eat lists for a while.  However, it will remain on our to-eat lists because Saturday dinners are booked until August!  Wtf.   

After deciding to stick to our Lebanese/Middle Eastern theme, we plus Spuey (who got excited cos he thought we got a reservation at Abla's) settled on Rumi which also has some outstanding reviews.

Arabic stencil separating us from the kitchen. 

For those in the know, Rumi featured on Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations Melbourne episode.  Matt Preston was his host for the city and by the looks of how much Matt was sweating, it was a sweltering day.

 Fast forward to 6.31 to see Anthony's thoughts on Rumi.  

We decided on the five course banquet at $45 a head.  It's a seasonal menu and pretty cheap by most standards.  The only thing that I really wanted to try were the succulent lamb ribs which Matt and Anthony raved, gnawed and licked their fingers over.  I quote - "Hands down the best f**king thing I've eaten in Melbourne so far."  That's a BIG statement. 

A Rumi 'course' consists of usually more than one plate of food.  So our entree consisted of some flat bread, dips, pickled vegies and sigara boregi – cheese filled pastry cigars.  Our second course included Persian meat balls, spiced school prawns and braised greens.

Cabbage and mint salad,  quail kebab with seasonal marinade (forgot what it was) and fried cauliflower.  I had read much about how good the cauliflower was here.  But in all honesty, it is what it is - fried cauliflower with sweet currants.  Neither Spu, Tina or Shazza felt the dish deserved the accolades it was receiving.  It's fried cauliflower FFS!

Freekeh salad, cos and herb salad.  It appears that they no longer serve lamb ribs but instead have spiced lamb shoulder.  It was dry roasted and served with a maltose syrup.  I was getting pretty excited about this... but it was just... ok.  Not bad, but nothing like the experience I was lead to believe I would have.  Mr. Bourdain and Mr. Preston - do you really know your stuff?

Dessert course - Turkish delight, arak poached apricots and either sweet Lebanese coffee or peppermint tea. These were nice but how much can a Lebanese restaurant screw up Turkish delight?

Overall, we were all pretty ho-hum about Rumi.  The food was good but not outstanding - none of us were  'enlightened' by the experience for sure.  We all agreed that we're probably not going eat there again anytime soon.  There's a good possibility that Rumi may be a victim of the TV exposure.  I suppose the restaurant was run off it's feet when that TV episode first aired back in 2009 and standards have probably declined since.

A little bit disappointed and still wanting something else to eat, I made Spuey drive us to Box Hill because I wanted some Asian dessert and I knew Monga Dessert House would be open.  I can see why people come here.  It's great for late night snacks, drinks and chatting.  However... I won't be coming back.  Like many other reviews, the desserts themselves weren't that great!

Spuey had the mango sago and I had the peanut glutinous ball tong sui.  The peanut balls were ok but the ginger soup was pretty bland.  Same with the mango sago.  Let me find a recipe!  I reckon I could make a better version!

Anyway, don't matter, there will be plenty of times to eat more food.... like tomorrow! 

Snuggie Love

Ok so what I'm about to tell you makes my (very high) position on the Cool-o-meter hit rock bottom - I bought a Snuggie blanket.  If you have been avoiding all types of media for the past few years and don't know what a Snuggie is then you should watch this very informative video.

Mine wasn't an original - oh the shame! - but one of many replicas available at any homegoods store.  As much as the advertisement has been the butt of jokes and ridicule, I was sold.  I needed this blanket dammit and had even asked Suboo to make me one.  I've been caught in those exact situations where your hand was too cold to reach out for the remote!  I didn't know what to do!!  Should I reach out, let my hand turn cold but be able to change the channel?!?  Or should I keep my hand inside, unable to switch to something less mundane?!?!  Oh, the dilemma.  

One of my workmates mentioned how she and her hubby would curl up on the couch with their Snuggie blankets and I was reminded that I had not yet joined the cult.  So off I went to the blanket area at work and made my purchase.  

$16.83 for a Snuggie which zips itself up into a cushion!  Dual function!  A pocket at the front for your remote!  What an ingenious addition!  It also had a 'foot pocket' so your feet wouldn't escape to the cold!  

The love for this Snuggie did not last long.  It smelled like petrochemicals and gave me a headache.  I kept breathing in the fibres through my nose and I felt like a cat who kept getting furballs at the back of their throat.  So I washed it.  It still smelled and I was still getting furballs.  So I washed it again and tumble dried it.... again and again.  The smell stopped lingering after about four washes but the furball effect just never let up.  My love turned to anger >:-(  Do you understand my frustration?  I wanted to love this blanket so much but all it was doing was twisting my pure, wholesome love into pure.......unadulterated...........hatred.  I had thrown out the receipt so I couldn't return it either :-S

Not liking you at all, you Crappy Snuggie.

Anyway it reached a point where I could tolerate it no more.  I had to do something about this terrible Snuggie and so I went on a Snuggie hunt.  Lucky for me, I found my solace quite quickly at Target and more disturbingly so, I felt REALLY HAPPY to find my new Snuggie.  It was like... alll this pent up, buried anger just disappeared.  I can't believe the passion I felt.  It really frightens me and I'm afraid I might be bordering on a psychotic disorder.  

There a few things about the new Snuggie - Target called it a Cuddle Blanket - which made me so happy.  The material was a billion times better - it was the typical polar fleece which although synthetic is very soft to touch and it was much thicker than Crappy Snuggie.  I didn't breathe in any fumes or fibres either.  Also, it had velcro attachments at the neck and at the back - your Snuggie need never fall off!  It didn't a foot pocket  but that didn't matter because it was loooooonnger than Crappy Snuggie.  It didn't have a remote control pocket either but with all those other pros, this new Snuggie was the outright winner.  

The other thing that gave me pure joy was the price - it was $15.  Already $1.83 cheaper than Crappy Snuggie.  But not just that, it was $15 and on special for $12.83!!!!  With that in mind, I took two blankets to the counter with the intention of giving one away.  To my absolute delight, each blanket scanned in at the register at $8.91!!  PURE JOY!!! :D :D

I waddled back to my apartment with my two happy Snuggies in tow.  Overjoyed by my bargain, I excitedly told Spu who seemed underwhelmed by it all.  But I was eager to share the love and I was still pretty annoyed that I thrown $16.83 down the drain for Crappy Snuggie so the logical thing to do was to buy... two more!

So... er, that's exactly what I did the following day.  Thus, 11 days after my initial Snuggie purchase, I am now the proud owner of four Snuggie blankets.  I didn't have much of a selection in colours so I've got one red one and three evergreen ones.  Don't worry, I'm not completely crazy, I just sharing the love - one is for Ma, one is for the Magic Couch/Me, one is for Moo for her Bavarian Winters and one is for Smee for when he is gaming at 5am.  

Oh yes, I sure am happy now.  This is just what I needed in life.

Spuey disrespecting the Snuggie and demonstrating improper use.  Tsk, tsk.  Put your arms in the sleeves please!

I hope someone out there understands what I was going through with my Snuggie frustration?  Someone?  Please? 

Things You Eat When You're Alone Part XII

 As promised with yesterday's post, here are a selection of goodies I've been eating while alone.

Appenzeller cheese and a glass of Grant Burge Hillcot Merlot.  Naice naice.  I am so classy. 

I really should avoid Breadtop but those displays of baked goods.. dammit.. are just so tempting!  The worst part is one is opening up next door to my work soon!  Now that's going to really test my strength. 

I bought a custard bun and tried to even it out by having some anti-oxidant rich green tea. *looks side to side*

The custard was actually quite bland.  At least I'll know not to buy this again! 

Breadtop - you're not winning the war against me just yet!

Cheese and Chilli Kransky

Ok, so it's back to the reality of work and eating alone once more.  I know that they are bad for you, but I like sausages.  I do try and avoid those really fake footy frankfurters with the unnaturally red skin but I guess what I'm eating here is not really much better - cheese and chilli kranksy!

Out of the fridge, onto an oven tray.  Already unhealthy, I'm not going to fry it.   

Oops, left it in the over for a bit too long and the skin cracked.  

Mmmm... oozing cheese.  Just how I like it.  Notice that I am eating this with a salad.

Tomorrow marks the return of more 'What you eat when you're alone' posts!  Yay!