Ikea = Fat Biatch with Sh*t Customer Service

You know, I like hanging out at IKEA. I do always have to refrain from buying super useful pieces of cheap furniture which has a 50/50 chance of falling apart. It's a bit of a different affair here in London. I don't own a car here and the IKEA stores all seem to be at least in Zone 4 or 5.

Anyway, I'm pretty much going to vent about last night's experience.

Me and Smee had bought some wire baskets and storage frame. We had no use for the extra ones purchased and no storage space either. It was a sensible thing to return them.

This is a little irrelevant but it made our simple adventure to Ikea a trying one. The late afternoon began with a bus ride from from St. Pauls using a bus that went direct to one of the numerous Ikea stores in London, specifically the one in Tottenham Hale. The timetable said it would take an an hour. Ok, ok we weighed that up and thought it wasn't so bad given that tube + bus would’ve taken at least 45 mins. Thirty minutes into the trip, the bus slowed due to a really really bad traffic jam. Then the driver turned off the bus lights and told everyone to get off!!! We had no idea where we were! No help from the bus driver either!

Luckily, I stayed awake during the ride and saw that we had passed a Tube station about 1km prior. So we jumped on the Piccadilly line, changed to the Victoria line to bring us to Tottenham Hale and then waited for a bus to Ikea. A one hour trip ended up being 1 hour 45 mins and we got to Ikea at 9pm. Good thing it shuts at 10pm.

We had to endure another wait at the returns desk. Once there, the 'helpful', dumb, fat biatch told us that the wire baskets we were returning were originally wrapped in packaging. Hence she could only give us a 60% refund because it wasn’t in it’s original state, but our other return items were fine.

Now, I know exactly what I picked up in the Ikea warehouse and these frigging baskets were stacked in a huge pile, without any form of tagging or packaging and I'm not going to let anyone tell me otherwise. Especially, when I KNOW they are wrong. On top of that, she was just blatantly rude, had the worst attitude and was just really asking for me to smack her out.

We told her it wasn't wrapped in any packaging of any sort. She huffed (she was a bit obese) with "Do you know how I know it has packaging? It says so on the receipt’. Then, she had the nerve to explain packaging to us "It is covered in plastic or has a tag" - by which we had to stop her mid-sentence as she was clearly insulting intelligence. We asked to speak to the manager, to which she grunted "What for?’

What for!?!?!!??!?! Are you f**king kidding me, woman!?! *imagining my fist going into her face*

Whilst she searched for the manager, we examined our wire baskets and found the barcode - ‘packaging’ if you will - printed on the basket itself. This was pointed out on her and the manager's return to the desk, by which she huffed again. An apology? Customer service? Nothing of the sort.

After watching her process the return of 4 baskets, she gave us a receipt and I realised that she only processed 3.

Me: ‘Excuse there are 4 baskets here’
Fat Biatch: ‘Well I saw 3’
Me: ‘Well there are 4, have a look’
Fat Biatch: ‘Don’t worry IF there are 4, then I will process your refund’

Wtf – I don’t give a f**king shit about a £3.50 basket. She was just downright patronising. I want a freaking apology and an acknowledgment that YOU WERE WRONG. Again, nothing of the sort.

We tracked down the manager and gave him a walloping complaint, like never before. At least he demonstrated a level of professionalism. If you're going to have that much attitude, at least back it up with knowledge. If you hate going to work, then stay in your frigging home. Stupid ass woman. *punches face*